Cat people like to joke that “Dogs have owners; Cats have staffs.”
Once Laura discovered my bedroom, it was all over. She abandoned her temporary domain in my office and moved her headquarters to my bed. I was allowed to visit her on the bed, sort of a more comfortable version of our sitting-on-the-floor sessions. I would offer a hand to be sniffed and she would allow a few pets.
In these early days of our negotiations she often responded with feline friskiness, grabbing my hand with both paws and a playful nibble on a knuckle. I am willing to bow to Lady of the Manor, but I will not tolerate Laura the Impaler. From the first nibble, I responded with “No, no” as I yanked my hand away. For an alternative, I scratched Laura just under her chin and she loved it. Our friendship grew by leaps and bounds. Laura was soon joining me in the recliner to watch television in the evenings.
Laura The Impaler sometimes sneaks back, trying to sharpen her weapons on my favorite living room chair, but I can chase the evil one away easily with “No, no.” The more prudent Lady of the Manor takes over and Laura goes to the nearby cardboard cat scratching box to finish grooming her claws.
I met Laura Tech-Diva when I went out of town overnight and monitored Laura with my Alexa Show. I used my phone to call the Alexa and repeat Laura’s name. Before long Laura came running. I could watch as she sniffed the screen on the floor and tilted her head at the sound of my voice. Tech-Diva also enjoys photo bombing when I am in the middle of a zoom meeting or Skyping with a friend.
Laura Spiderwoman enjoys unraveling balls of yarn and weaving webs around chair legs. Wayne Grets-Kitty plays hockey down the hall with a red milk bottle cap as her puck. When she gets close to the goal (my bedroom), the game is more like football. She picks up the puck in her mouth and jumps up onto the bed. Touchdown!
I put a plate of freshly grilled burgers on the counter the other day as I went to eat my dinner in the other room. When I returned to put the extras in the fridge, there was one less than I remembered. I went in search of my little charge. I found her sitting innocently on a rug in my bedroom.
“Have you seen my hamburger?” I asked.
“Who me?” said Laura the Hamburgler as she looked up at me and licked her chops. Then she smugly got up and walked away, revealing a half-eaten burger where she had been sitting.
Needless to say I have loved the many Lives of Laura during the past three months. But the foster phase is about to end. A family has applied to adopt Laura. Soon she will move into her forever home and a new life will begin.
If you’d like to share the fun by adopting or volunteering, check out Country Cat Lady.